Kim Hye-jin - Concerning My Daughter

Kim Hye-jin - Concerning My Daughter 

5⭐

Genre: Korean Literature, Fiction, Contemporary Fiction, Asia Literature, LGBTQIA+, K-Drama

Original Title: 딸에 대하여

Original Language: Korean

Translated by: Jamie Chang 

Pages:  176

Format: Paperback 

Publisher: Picador 

Date Published: 14th April 2022 

Book Blurb: 

When an ageing mother allows her thirty-something daughter to move into her apartment, she wants for her what many mothers might say they want for their child: a steady income, and, even better, a good husband with a good job with whom to start a family.

But when Green turns up with her girlfriend, Lane, in tow, her mother is unprepared and unwilling to welcome Lane into her home. In fact, she can barely bring herself to be civil. Having centred her life on her husband and child, her daughter’s definition of family is not one she can accept. Her daughter’s involvement in a case of unfair dismissal involving gay colleagues from the university where she works is similarly strange to her.

And yet when the care home where she works insists that she lower her standard of care for an elderly dementia patient who has no family, who travelled the world as a successful diplomat, and who chose not to have children, Green’s mother cannot accept it. Why should not having chosen a traditional life mean that your life is worth nothing at all? 

My Review: 

Just love translated fiction, especially Asian fiction. Concerning my daughter is no exception. I loved it so much as in a few short pages this book tackled so many issues and made me go through so many emotions. It took me a few days after reading this novella to gather my thoughts on it and rethink everything that was discussed and that’s how powerful this book is. 

This novella follows a Korean mother in her seventies who struggles with her health yet works long hours in a care home taking care of elderly and ill patients. She is never named in the book but we know that she has a daughter that she worries about. Her daughter is gay and for the last seven years living with a girlfriend called Lane. The mother is blaming herself that her daughter is different, that her daughter is in her thirties but doesn’t want a normal family, a husband and children. She also blames herself that her daughter alongside her work fights for LGBTQ+ rights. The mother also blames Lane for making her daughter not want a husband and kids. She also blames Lane for making her daughter gay. 

Throughout the book, the mother is struggling to accept her daughter's sexuality and life choices. We see her battling with herself, her morals, her upbringing, traditions and societal expectations of her generation, as well as her love for her daughter and wanting her daughter to have a good and respectful life. It is very interesting to see how her emotions and thinking process change throughout the book too as she sees how her daughter is discriminated outside of the home environment by others, such as her job, society and other people. 

It was very interesting to see the thought process of the mother and see her going through all those emotions and moods when she is dealing with the fact that her daughter is gay. It is the first book ever that I have read that is exploring this point of view of a loved one getting in terms of their loved one’s sexuality. 

Also, it was so interesting to read about the cultural and societal differences, especially to see how differently society is seeing and treating the LGBTQ+ community in Korea when compared to Western countries like the USA and the UK. Also, not only the marginalisation of LGBTQ+ communities but also the marginalisation of elderly people and seeing them as burdens is heavily discussed in this book, which was very interesting to read as I wasn’t familiar with Korean culture around that subject. 

I learned a lot from this book about Korean culture, generational perceptions and issues that are present there. I love reading about different cultures and societies; thus, this book was perfect in that educational aspect. 

Overall: Very powerful and important book, exploring the mother’s emotions and perspectives whilst she is getting into terms of her daughter being gay. Definitely a perfect book when it comes to educating yourself on Korean culture, and current social issues in Korean society, such as the marginalisation of LGBTQ+ communities and elderly people. Can’t wait to read more Asian-translated fiction about these topics and learn more about Korean culture and society. 

About the Author:

Kim Hye-jin was born in Daegu, Korea, in 1983. She debuted in 2012 when her story ‘Chicken Run’ won Dong-A Ilbo’s Spring Literary Award. She won the Joongang Novel Prize for Joongang Station, and the Shin Dong-yup Prize for Literature for Concerning My Daughter.

https://www.panmacmillan.com/authors/kim-hyejin/41542